Just an update

Heeeeyyyyy!

So clearly, my nursing school, work, mommy, wife, and gym schedule has left little time for me to blog but I will do a quick catch up of my life. lol. Thanksgiving, TWO THUMBS UP! Man I love my Mom. It was so awesome heading down to Savannah to spend time with her. Everytime I go, it makes me want to take another trip down as soon as possible. The great part is that in less than a month, she will be up for Christmas and Jonathan will get to have more time with his Gramma. Speaking of my little man Jonathan, he is just awesome. I can't get over how much I love that kid. He is amazing. Honestly and truly, just a complete joy of a son. I love him so much and as he grows, he is just becoming more and more funny and full of life. He definitely has his mommys stubborness, but he is truly a good kid. Truly truly a great kid, and he is my pride and joy. My hubs... just my whole heart. I don't talk about him often because this journal is mostly about me and my weight struggles, but the way that man loves me. You know, I feel bad when people are all like "ooh! Marriage is WORK! It is HARD!" ...because I know it takes works I suppose but... well, ours is just so easy. Now keep in mind we only have been married for 3.5 years so I know we have many many years of trials and tribulations that will test us, but right now, God has been so good to us.I mean, we just love eachother, and that love makes things easy. It just really does. It is so easy to love that man. And he tells me every single day how he feels about me. Every. Single. Day. And as I lose weight and I start loving MYSELF, its easier to love him more. We were just talking about that in the kitchen yesterday. He was talking about how proud he is of me and my weight loss and how I've truly been kicking butt and have this determination. I was telling him how I am working hard to be that hot milf/trophy wife for him and he took my face in his hands and said, "you have ALWAYS been that. I've ALWAYS thought you were the most beautiful woman in this world, so you lose this weight for you. Not me. I love you losing this weight because of how YOU are feeling. The glow and confidence you now have, but other than that, you have always been gorgeous in my eyes." Um yea...you already know he got some for that. lol. But I just love him for supporting me and while I still have so much more progress to make, Im working at it.

So speaking of progress, I have no idea what my weight is right now. I weighed tuesday before Thanksgiving and I was still at 188. I won't lie, I was a little pissed but I didn't do the best i could in food or exercise I suppose. I refused to weigh in yesterday because quite frankly, I stuffed my flippin face while down at my moms and just needed a week off. SO since Sunday, I have been in BEAST MODE. Really working hard. It could also have something to do with the fact I went dress shopping for a Christmas Party my friend Danielle and I are going to with our hubbies December 15th (YAY) and I picked out a dress that was TIGGHHTT! Now, I did go up a size to accommodate for my massive boobs, but if I gain weight and the fit is off, I will look less on the classier side. The dress is great though, length is at the knees and its definitely glitzy for the holiday. I just want to look my best in it. Especially since it is my only option dress. I found nothing else I really loved when i went shopping and I just got annoyed. So I am hoping when it comes in this week, it looks as good as I imagined in my head. I REALLY hope so. So the dress will be in today. We shall see if it fits okay!
I have been getting several compliments lately that people are FINALLY noticing I lost weight! I had three compliments this morning alone and several yesterday in class. I will say that I have changed my routine these last two weeks. I had only been running on the treadmill but knowing I need to push and challenge myself for more weight loss, I've finally added weight training to my workout. Shouldve done it a long time ago, but I will admit i was lazy. So anyways, my arms are actually getting smaller and my butt and legs are toning up, although I will say running got my butt back to sitting higher up! My hubs can't keep his hands off of it. I really can't wait be in the 30 lb loss number. I know I am close and that is my goal for this Tuesday. I REALLY would LOVE to see that scale say 184. OH MAN... it makes me salivate just looking at that number. I know it requires me to remain disciplined this week. i KNOW that. I have a weekend full of temptations. I have a favorite things party on friday which I just found out will have delectable pizza and cheesecake bites. Then I have a LONG ASS clinical day on Saturday with my biggest temptation ever... don't laugh but... SALTINE FRICKIN CRACKERS!!! OMMMMGGG!!!!! And these damn saltines are DELICIOUS. I mean, I don't know if they put a little extra salt or what on it but I GO TO TOWN. And it bloats me up and I know it isnt smart, but I just can't help myself sometimes. I get crazy over it... sigh. so yeah, saltines is my nemesis. Anyways, Tuesday is my weigh in. I will post my progress then. Hopefully I will see my 184. that is what I am aiming and working so hard for. thirty lbs... 30. POUNDS...

Excuses...

Vacation, Hurricane, Weigh In-- OH MY!

*hi*

Um yeah, I know I have been completely MIA and I feel bad because I am just now trying to catch up with everyone. First of all, my family went to vacation to New York the week of October 23rd. Well, our flight home was suppose to be October 28th, but as you already know, that did NOT happen. We were stuck in New York until Thursday night and didnt get in our beds until 2am on that Friday. Despite my school and work suffering, we truly had a great time and I am grateful we had the opportunity to see everyone. With that being said, I ate like a frickin sumo wrestler! Ooohhhh man, and it was delicious. but by the end of two weeks, the pants I wore on the flight definitely felt a little snugger than normal and the shirt I put on before that looked super flattering, started not to look that great. My cousin had a scale but I was terrified to get on it. I would stare at it literally everyday. It was mocking me...it knew I didn't have the courage to face the truth and it was right. I didn't. When i got back from New York, it was hard to get back in focus with eating. In fact, I resorted back to my "I'll start on Monday" mentality. I ate Pollo Tropical Friday night and pizza on Saturday night. But when Monday came along, I went balls to the wall. I knew I didn't have the courage to weigh in that week. Although I knew that is what I SHOULD do, I know myself. I know my mind. I knew if I saw the truth on that scale, I would feel discouraged. I would feel angry. And I wanted to be motivated. I decided to forego one week and just work my ass off. And work my ass off I did. I ran EVERY. SINGLE.DAY. Two miles, three miles, three and a half miles. I ran until my shin splints screamed and still ran. I went back every single day, even Saturday and Sunday. Despite lack of sleep, despite any other excuse I could think of.I ran and ran and ran. I weighed in today and...not only did I lose the unspecified NY weight, but I lost 1.2 lbs on top of that... I AM IN THE FRICKING 180s!!!! I cant believe I AM IN THE 180s!!!! Oh man, I am so excited. I could jump up and down I am so excited. I want to scream it from the rooftops. I know I still have a long ways to go. I know I can't get comfortable now, especially with Thanksgiving coming up. IN fact, this is the time I need to kick it into high gear in order to make up for the gluttonous feast I plan on partaking in. Also, I have family pictures next week and it would be great to look my absolute best for this! If I could get down to 186, the weight I was when I got married, that would be an accomplishment in my book :). I plan on going to watch Twilight Friday with a friend Friday afternoon and then going out on Friday night so I am going to have to be strong and make some positive choices. I hope I can do it...EEK! Better start researching WW points now... GOOD LUCK TO EVERYONE AS THEY CONTINUE ON THEIR JOURNEY!! WE CAN DO THIS!! WE CAN!!

Weigh In Wednesday...

I. frickin fracking did it. I DID IT!! did what? Well, just did a slew of things that I never thought I would accomplish. First of all, I did the mud run as you guys saw from the picture. I am hella proud of me and my partner in crime. We worked our ass off and it was no small feat. WE DID IT! After the mudrun though, i started to feel feverish. The next day, I went to the doctor with a temp of 102.4 and feeling a complete wreck. After a chest xray, a breathing treatment, shot in the ass, a pharmacy of drugs, I left with a diagnosis of bronchitis and a sinus infection. So happy I went because it truly helped me. Anyways, my appetite was very little so both days I had pretty much a banana, breakfast  bar, chick fila bowl of soup, some saltine crackers and a little bit of dinner (chicken and spinach). Not much at all but I was forcing myself to eat even the above. I LOST 5 LBS THIS WEEK!!! It helps burning calories coughing so hard that your abs are actually sore (and I have been purposely flexing them in preparation of a cough everytime as well...hey you might as well fit it in somehow since I didn't have energy for cardio). Anyways, the 5lbs got me to 190 lbs on the scale. PROUD DOESN'T BEGIN TO SAY HOW I FEEL. I AM 190 LBS! I LOST 10% OF MY BODY WEIGHT!!!  I AM ONE POUND FROM THE 180s! I AM ONE POUND FROM THE 180s!!!!! I AM ONLY 5 lBS FROM 185, the weight I was when I got married! ONe of the last times I felt beautiful (well not counting pregnancy because I felt sexy pregnant. LOVED my buddha belly!). 5 lbs away. I have lost a total of 24.6 LBS. I am 5.4 lbs away from losing 30 lbs. I am just happy ya'll. And Im proud of me. I can't even lie, i definitely celebrated with a bread bowl of chili for lunch...and MAN it was delicious. I AM STUFFED! But every wednesday, I have me a cheat meal. I don't have cheat days, I have a cheat meal. And in my cheat meal, I refused the cheese in my chili...yes, I put sour cream, but its better than cheese, right :) ? Baby steps.  And instead of a dessert, I had a fresh fruit salad from the salad bar. But anyways, I got me a long way to go right now. My goal is still 170. At least for right now. I will see how I feel at that weight before saying I want to be less than that. But it actually feels as though my goal is attainable. I feel like I can reach it. I hope all of my weight loss friends out there are doing well. Its a struggle, for sure, but we can do it. We need to remain accountable, ask ourselves before we eat something if this will take us closer or farther from our weight loss goal. I use to wish myself skinny. Now I am fighting tooth and nail to be healthier. Wishing will get me no where. Not making changes or making excuses for myself and "hoping" the scale will move down is just unrealistic. Not pushing myself physically and expecting to see my body change is being delusional. I have to keep doing what I am doing. I have to work. I have to PUSH. I have to want being healthier more than I want a bad food choice. And its not easy. And I am not perfect, and some days, I just fail miserably. But I do my best to make up for it now, and make it a reason to make better choices the next meal, or push harder in my workout. Anyways, I am feeling PROUD PROUD PROUD! HOW ARE YOU GUYS DOING!?

OPERATION 5K--- COMPLETE!

We did it!! Danielle and I did it!!!!

No surprise

I am up. And I knew I would be. I gained one pound this week and I know what caused it. First of all, I didn't work out for one week. I had a medical issue that caused me to go to the ER on Saturday (not serious, just embarrassing). I have been told not to run. Well, without me running, my mouth was left idle. I bought baked lays for my husband and ate almost a half of a bag a couple nights before bed. I literally, COULD NOT STOP. I know that the saltiness plus the high glycemic index of those chips did me in the moment I licked my last finger. I am back in serious control of my weight right now. I don't care what the doc says, I will be back working out. My race in literally in a few days and by Sunday, i want to be down that pound. My goal for weigh in next week is three pounds. I know I got this. I am bummed because I was only one pound away from my 10% goal and I ruined it, but I will get it back. Im so close to my goals I can feel it and I won't let a bad week deter me.

The weigh in....

Man, I have really been sucking at updating and this blog will be pretty short. I had a crappy eating weekend. On Friday I went on a date with my hubby and I had a margarita, a half of a philly cheesesteak and fries for dinner. Then on Saturday I went out with my FABULOUS friend Charlie who was in from out of town and I had two glasses of wine, a few nibbles of fried shrimp appetizers, 2 chicken wings in blue cheese dressing, a half of a turkey burger ( I literally cut it in half before I ate it and only ate half) and a serving of fried okra. Oh yeah, i went in... But I will tell you what I did right this weekend. Those two dinners were the only bad blemishes in my day. I made sure my breakfast, lunch, and snacks were on point. I ran 3.1 miles on Friday, 3.1 miles on Sunday, 2.4 miles on Monday, and 3.1 miles on Tuesday. Yes, I ran my frickin ass off. I was desperately trying to make up for the weekend as well as train for the 5K race me and my girl Danielle are running October 14th. Literally a week and a half away. I also made sure that I kept my diet on point the rest of the week. I ate well. So after my 3.1 mile run yesterday (which I did in just over 36 mins...not too shabby for a big girl) I was sweating PROFUSELY. I mean it was pouring even after I was running. MY FAT WAS BAWLING!!! I pushed it hard and it didn't like it. I knew I was going to lose something this week. Didnt know what it was going to be, but I knew it was going to be something. Even though I ate badly this weekend, I knew I made up for it. I fought for it. And... I LOST THREE LBS! I am now at 194 lbs with a total weight loss of 20.6 lbs. I am in the 20s. I AM IN THE 20s!!!! I worked my butt off and it truly made a difference! I am only ONE POUND away from my 10% goal. ONE POUND. that target seemed so far fetched when I first signed up for weight watchers and I am just really happy and proud of my dedication. It hasn't been easy. My shin splints hurt like all hell, Ive tasted every possible SmartOnes cuisine made, its been more expensive to buy fresh shrimp, and salmon, and tilapia, and chicken every single week, as well as those KIND bars that are SO FLIPPING GOOD but cost like $1.25 EACH. It sucks buying fresh fruit every few days because it goes bad so quickly and it stinks sometimes having to make sure I am preparing all of my dinners at home because popping in a stouffers lasagna just isn't the most healthful option but I've been doing it. And this part feels good. The results feel good. I still have SO MUCH MORE to go. I mean so much more. I tried on an outfit this weekend that was a size smaller than I wore before but it still just didn't look good on my bootydo (my affectionate name for my big flappy belly). 194 lbs is far from svelte and I know that but I am looking better. I am having people take notice and in order to get to 174, I have to be at 194. I'm halfway there. I am frickin halfway there and this halfway doesnt feel half as impossible as the first day I walked into weightwatchers. What this has done is given me even more hope and focus. So anyways, I'm proud of me. I'm excited about my progress and I will continue to keep forging forward. I CAN DO THIS!!!!!!!!